Posts tagged ‘happy’
It is interesting to me that I have lived in this apartment for three months, a quarter of a year, and I have not cried here. I have not cried in a relatively long time for me.
So either I have started prioritizing stress better or I have removed stress from my life. I think both thinks happened. With my family, I know I have made them proud and that they are always there. With my personal life I think I have grown up again.
Every year I think, “woo I have grown up a lot since last year.” Every year I believe that is a true statement. Last year as a junior I broke up with my best friend again and started dating a boy I was dating purely so I would not go back to my old relationship.
Lesson learned broken is broken. You can’t fix what can’t help itself. In this relationship that was just a relationship for the sake of keeping me out of the single category I became a cheater.
I believe that I am good at seeing things or situations from others people perspective but in this case or rather in his case I didn’t care. I saw him as a generally selfish person that was dating me for bragging right among his friends so I did whatever I wanted whenever it hit me. Lied and mostly just said nothing. Looking back I still don’t feel sorry for it and I even talk to that guy I was dating on occasion. Never told him never will.
It weirds me out that I don’t feel sorry but I guess I just didn’t feel anything for him. We were both using each other.
In my new relationship I don’t want to even be seen in other boy’s car because – don’t want it getting back to my boyfriend. (We go to a small college where the slightest possibility of drama spreads like wild fire.)
After I cheated on that old ex boyfriend I began to worry that if once a cheater always a cheater but I now see that is not the case. I didn’t cheat before that guy not ever and I could never now I am too happy.
What I am saying I guess is if you can’t hold still maybe you should move.
I am in a beautiful hand holding relationship.
As a freshman I was in a relationship with a non-hand holder. Then last year I put myself in a hand holding relationship but the hand holding was grade C at best.
Now I’m in a relationship with a hand holder that is second only to my Daddy.
We went to the square today for dinner with a mutual friend. Walking to the car, walking to restaurant, in front of friends, walking around, walking to car, just standing around, hand holding.
I have no idea way but handholding is important to my relationships. When it isn’t in a relationship it is important enough for me to crave so I’m very happy with the situation of handholding.
I thought once when I was with the anti-hand-holder, that maybe I was just clingy and childish for wanting the handholding but no no good and frequent hand-holders are out there.
Why is handholding such an important connection?