Archive for August, 2008

dense fog

What am I supposed to do with all the uncontrollable variables? I move 900 miles from home for the summer, and now I feel like there is a distance much great between myself and some people that I believed I had strong relationships with. I must admit there is a silver lining: I learned that I am more important to some than I understood. I guess it comes down to the curious investment of one’s time, as in where one chooses to put their time. I wonder what I have that seems worth “investing” in. It is distressing to know how easy it is to loose best-friends, or to be more honest, it is amazing how much one can lie to there own-self. Always trying to see the good because there was great there once.

Every few months, since starting college I have changed my ‘friend group’ drastically. I hang out with four or five people and within a few months I will only be friends with one of them. It seems like this summer I am returning home to find only a select few strong friends. I try to keep seeing how this is a great opportunity, because I see who loses interest when I am out of sight and out of mind, but I can help but be a little said with how wrong I was with so many people.

I think ultimately I need to trust myself more. It seems like my first pass over people is fairly accurate but sometimes or rather most of the time I read too far, and look too deep.

I can be someone’s angel but I can’t be everyone’s angel. (more…)

August 2, 2008 at 4:58 am Leave a comment

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